Do You Understand?

I was on a low day today. Work and some other stuff just bogging me down. So as the day comes to an end I wait for his call. It is always nice to hear his voice when I am upset...and I want to talk to him...tell him what I am going through...coz I know he'll understand. That's where I made the mistake. He is not a phone kinda guy...but well I know - coz he has told me - that he calls every day as I like talking. But I guess he'd like to keep most phone conversations to a 'hey, how've you been?' or 'how was work?' or just the plain and simple I love you's and I miss you's. The problem is for his questions he expects answers like 'great!', 'not so good' or even better 'I am tired...want to hit the sack'. The last reply means the call is going to end like now. But my responses to his questions are usually detailed - stuff from work and home and all the other things from my usually uneventful day. So he starts listening and then moves over to hearing and then goes on to watch TV with a regular 'hmmm' or 'ok'...you know the neutral responses. Coming to the call today...I was low and I wanted to talk about it...and the nice guy that he is...he let me. And then after venting out...I was like 'Do you understand?'. Now that is something a girl should never ask a guy. The plain fact is girls do not understand guys and vice versa. Last evening I was watching this TV show 'Rules of Engagement'...and there too the wife wants her husband to understand her...but 20 minutes into the show you know that he will never understand her and like the husband says she never understands that he doesn't understand. Now despite all this wisdom...I wonder why do I go back and ask him 'Do you understand?' coz I know the response is always 'I do - you were saying blah blah blah' where he just re-narrates all that I have told him. Yes, I must give that to him...he knows what I am talking about (I have heard men usually have no clue about that either). But there hardly ever is a response, reaction or even better a solution. That is what I always feel. But the truth is there is always a response - 'ok', a reaction - 'cool/cheer up' depending on the whining and a solution - 'ignore it'. However, as a woman I am not satisfied with these. Not coz I didn't get a response, reaction or solution...but just coz I didn't get the response, reaction or solution that I expected. Which basically means...that I already know my problem...what I need to do and how I am going to go about doing it. Yet there is some kind of validation I seek from him...which I never get. The thing is I get the response, reaction and solution I expect from my girlfriends. And we do a great job of figuring things out...largely coz we understand each other and we think alike. Still I hope and I wish that he understands me...says all the right things...and listens to me. Which basically means that I do not understand him...coz him not understanding me is just how it is going to be most of the time. Which means we both may not ever understand each other...yet we decide to spend our lives together...do you understand? I am waiting for the response, reaction and solution...